Not having an internet connection sucks.

I'm currently in an odd situation, as I have no ISP at my apt. It was basically going to cost me at best (dial up) $250 and worst (DSL) $450. Now I'm resorting into sneaking into Medical Conventions, or trying my hand at the public library . . . it sucks monkey balls.

Okay, I'm pissed. I talked to my buddy Lucas who saw Bright Eyes last Monday in Fort Worth . . . I would have gone, however, I had a bad experience last time I saw him, and I was broke . . . mind you I could have found the money, but still the combination lead me to not go. So . . . Mr. Fucking Bright Eyes . . . Do me a personal favor, and never come to Texas again. Never schedule a tour through here, in fact, leave Oklahoma alone too. I'm in Dallas and that's just too close to me. Never come back. Pull your CD's from out shelves, ban any magazine with you on the cover, especially those pronouncing you the greatest songwriter of our time, pull your action figures from out Wheaties boxes, and please, please, please, stop allowing Texans to help support your whiney little indie ass. You sir, are from hence forth banned from our state.

This should make you happy since you put on terrible shows here. This should make you happy because you do not talk to you audience here. This should make you happy because you attempt to alienate every Republican Texan by speaking to you OBVIOUSLY MORE LIBERAL THAN THE REST OF THE STATE crowds. This should make you happy because when you come here you berate us and tell us how much you hate Texas. This should make you happy since you think all of us should abandon our roots just like you and move to New York. This should make you happy because you hate all of your fans here, simply because of where we live. And this should make you happy because this is where "W is from" and (this is a quote from you) "Thanks Texas for giving us a really great president" (mockingly of course).

Well pal . . . please don't come back. Thanks, but no thanks. I love your music. I think you ARE one of the greatest songwriters of our time. I think your opinions, when thought about before said and not run through a fifth of bourbon as a filter, are very intelligent. I'm very sad that you are no longer allowed in Texas, but that's just how it works. You're an asshole, you can't play anymore.

And FYI, 51% of this nation voted for W. How many of them listen to your music? How many of them help pay you high-toned NYC rent? How many of them go to you shows?

Obviously I didn't do a poll outside, but I'd make a safe guess that your crowd wasn't exactly a typical Texas crowd. I'd guess that you should be far angrier with those people in the Starbucks across the street than inside the venue. Just a thought . . . and even if they were . . . let's try saving the insults for after show . . . maybe when Texans were ACTIVELY paying off your fucking beach house. There are many a liberal in Texas sir. And you are doing you damnedest to make sure that we leave, instead of fighting the good fight here. YEAH!! THAT'S WHAT I'LL DO!! I'll give up all my efforts to raise the democratic vote in Texas, even though we are 4% points from being a legitimate swing state. I'll gather up all my democratic colleagues and head to NYC!! That's gonna make a difference!! You're right Connor . . . that's why WE pay you the big bucks isn't it?

Listen . . . you're a very emotional guy and I understand that, but please never come back here. I'll fly to Vancouver or San Francisco or INSERT LIBERAL CITY HERE to come see you. I bet you put on great shows there. Of course, it much easier when you are surrounded by people who love the music and just want you to do well . . . wait kinda like Fort Worth . . . or Austin (which you also stated that you "even fucking hate")


So I challenge you sir . . . to never come back, never take any money from a Texan, and never speak of this conversation. Please continue your ridiculous hatred of Texas as a whole and not the Republicans living here.

Goodbye Bright Eyes.

I hope I never see you again . . . Unless it's on cable . . . you playing Amsterdam or something . . . maybe hacky sack . . . that's liberal right? Hacky Sack? Hacky Sack in Amsterdam? Eh, just as long as you're happy. Because it's all about you sir, not those who pay you to alienate them, right? You immature little indie bitch.

Love,
I'll download the hell out of you, but you'll never see a dime from me ever again . . . in Texas.